5 Tips For Improving Your Sex Life

Getting two people on the same page about sex isn’t easy. But sexual relationships, like all relationships, need to be negotiated and worked at — which is what you can start doing with these tips from Dr. Phil.

1. Maintain a good overall relationship.
If one of you feels unsupported or unappreciated, chances are you won’t be rolling in the hay very often. If you want a good sexual relationship, it needs to be just one piece of a good overall relationship.

2. Examine your relationship.
Sex involves vulnerability. It is an act that can flow freely only with mental, emotional and physical trust. If you are having sexual frustrations, examine the relationship at large. Are you creating an environment of giving, receiving, trust and relaxation? If not, changing those dynamics will be essential before your sex life can change.

3. Let go.
Sex should not be forced. It should be just one more way of expressing mutuality, support and caring. It can then be the springboard for more thoughts and appreciative behaviors that will bridge into the next, seemingly spontaneous, sexual interaction.

4. Be a good partner.
It is illogical for you to ignore your significant other in the morning, bark at him/her during the day, argue in the evening, and then fall into his/her arms for a fanciful sexual adventure at night. Insensitivity, inattention and hostility make sexual intimacy unnatural. If you want a rhythmic pattern of sexual intimacy, then create a relational pattern that reflects the same intimate emotions.

5. Make sex a priority.
If everything with your partner seems to be flowing consistently, problems with sexual relations may persist for different reasons. There are times when one or both partners become distracted and allow sexual interaction to slide down the priority scale. These couples have allowed a number of competing activities and circumstances to rob them of this very special, intimate exchange. You must consciously commit to putting sex back in your life.

www.loveandindulgence.com.au

Why Do Women Think They Are Fat When They Are Not?

Written by Mel Macdonald
One of the topics I like to talk about is the one topic that all women hate, Their Bodies!

We as women are always soo paranoid about every nook and cranny on our bodeies and believe that everyone, especially men, is looking at them and thinking "what a fat woman". Thats why women like to have the lights off when being intimate with a man

Let me fill you in with a little secret ladies,
Men don't give a sh*t what you look like, they are just happy they are allowed to touch you! 
This is words straight from men's mouths. Thats right, if you want to turn a guy and impress him, LEAVE THE LIGHTS ON!

So the big question is, why do we look at ourselves like this?

I have popped a few video's here to watch, ponder, and reconsider what we THINK we are seeing in the mirror. The amazing thing is it doesn't matter if you're a size 6 or 22 all women act the same and TODAY is the day we need to STOP and start loving our bodies.

www.loveandindulgence.com.au

Do people really have sex in airports?

What do you do while waiting for your flight? A new survey suggests one in 10 of us have had an 'amorous encounter' to pass the time. By Jolyon Attwooll

 

How do you pass the time while waiting for a flight? Read a book? Browse duty free? Hit the bar? Or something more intimate..?

According to the so-called “findings” of a company called Jetcost.co.uk (they’re a flight comparison website), released this week, one in 10 of us admits to having had an "amorous encounter" in an airport.

Rarely has a claim been met with such universal derision at Telegraph Travel. The subject line of its email, about what people do while waiting for a flight, should have been warning enough.

“The Rise of the 'Airport Club'”, it said. “1 in 10 Britons Has Had a Sexual Encounter in an Airport”

It rapidly got worse.

2,521 people had apparently replied to this survey. Of them, “nine per cent... admitted that they’d had a sexual encounter while in an airport before."

Of course.

“The most popular place in which people joined the ‘airport club’ in such a way was ‘airport toilets’ (76 per cent), followed by ‘storage area/room’ (21 per cent).

Oh really?

Slightly more sensibly, there were statistics on people's favourite activities while waiting at airports. Eating and drinking was the most popular (79 per cent), followed by reading (52 per cent), and duty free shopping (30 per cent).

But the real thrust - if you'll excuse the phrase - of the press release was the rise of so-called amorous airport encounters.

"In order to compare how common sex in an airport was to those who had joined the ‘mile-high club’, all respondents were also asked if they’d ever had a sexual encounter on an aircraft, to which only 4 per cent admitted that they had. 31 per cent of these had been caught in the act."

Spare us, please.

But no...

“Anyone who claimed they’d had sex in an airport was asked why they had done so, to which 32 per cent said they were ‘in the holiday spirit’ and 27 per cent said that they wanted the ‘thrill’ of not knowing if they’d get caught.”

Ah, that famous holiday spirit that encourages people to take their clothes off in public places? A quick straw poll of our writers found no one who had ever found sufficient “spirit” to do the same.
So either we’re bucking the average, some of us aren’t being honest, or the survey’s results should be approached with, let’s say, caution.

Are we being too cynical?

www.loveandindulgence.com.au

6 Qualities That Make You a Love Magnet

Forget about ripped abs, bulging biceps, and a flat stomach, as well as a fat bank account, friends in high places, and your own private jet. These six personality traits power the pull of magnetic attraction. 

Written beautifully by Thomas G. Fiffer for The Good Men Project.

It’s nearing the end of the day and the weekend’s approaching. Are you getting ready to go home to your lover and making fun weekend plans? Or are you reading advice articles and wondering why, despite your hours at the gym and in those continuing ed classes, that special someone you desire so dearly to date—and perhaps move in with or marry—never seems to materialize? Some people choose a single life, and embracing solitude doesn’t mean staying solitary or feeling unfulfilled. But for those who are seeking—and not finding—the perfect partner of your dreams, the list below offers some surprises on what people truly find irresistible.

1. Consistency. Myth: Consistent people are dull and boring; they lack spontaneity and a sense of adventure. Consistency may be the hobgoblin of small minds, but it is the heart of successful relationships. Being consistent doesn’t rule out “Surprising your mate with an unexpected [whatever the magazine recommends].” You can be consistently surprising, consistently out of the box, consistently different. What being consistent does mean is showing up when you say you will. It means working steadily at projects until you finish. It means having values and principles and sticking to them, especially when they’re challenged. And it means maintaining healthy emotional and physical life habits. Consistent people know that being present in the same way every day beats the occasional grand gesture hands down every time. Consistency is … tempting.

2. Balance. Myth: All passionate lovers are emotionally unstable basket cases. Being balanced doesn’t mean you don’t possess strong passions—in the conference room or the bedroom—or that you dutifully list the pros and cons before your every move. Being balanced means you have a center and can navigate rough waters and roll with the surges. It means you don’t easily get upset or thrown off your game. It means you can understand and accept a person’s feelings while respectfully disagreeing. And it means you don’t internalize the anxiety of the people around you. Balanced people have their own thermometer that remains at body temperature when things around them start to bubble and boil. Balance is … hot.

3. Openness. Myth: Open people lack conviction and don’t know what they want. Being open doesn’t mean being willing to do anything or answering every question with, “whatever, you choose.” Being open means being open-minded, open to new experiences and experiments. Being open means listening before you decide or judge. Being open means joining your partner in an unpleasant emotion—frustration, disappointment, sadness—even if it is not your own and even if you are the cause. Being open also means never, ever being dismissive and always being open to discussion. Being open means being open-eyed and aware of your own issues. And being open means being generous and acting with an open heart and open hands. Openness is … alluring. 

4. Impulse control.  Myth: Impulsive people are the only ones who are free be themselves, generate excitement, and pursue their dreams. Having impulse control doesn’t mean suppressing your true nature, measuring out your life with coffee spoons, or never taking a risk or blowing the budget on something big. Having impulse control means not behaving in a self-destructive manner. It means not gossiping or indulging negativity. It means putting your best interest ahead of your self-interest—most of the time—and leaning towards your better nature. It means holding back even when you’re enraged and holding your tongue as well. It means not thinking from below the waist. And it means responding instead of reacting. Impulse control is … seductive.

5. Tenderness. Myth: Tender people are weak and oversensitive. Tenderness is not the opposite of strength but the foundation of strength, and sensitivity is a strong quality. Being tender means baring your heart, exposing your soft parts with a confident vulnerability. It means acting gently and with compassion, a stance that requires courage. It means humbly acknowledging your own frailty as you lend support to others, knowing they will lean on you and make you bend. It means not just drying tears and dusting someone off but affirming that it’s OK to cry. It means when someone is pushed and stumbles, you shout “man down” instead of “man up.” It means foreplay is an act in itself. Tenderness is … arousing.

6. Boundaries. Myth: Boundaries are those silly things you let go of when you fall in love. Boundaries are absolutely the most important thing you can bring to and maintain in every type of relationship and especially in intimate ones. Having boundaries eliminates confusion and lets you be clear when you communicate. Having boundaries means you don’t secretly resent what you allow. Having boundaries means you have self-respect, without which you’re not capable of respecting your partner. Having boundaries means you always know where you stand with each other and what happens if you cross the line. Having boundaries means understanding that healthy relationships are based on accommodation, not sacrifice. Having boundaries is … sexy.

Watch These Awesome Lesbian Women Teach Clueless Straight People About 'Real Sex'

 

What is your definition of Sex?

www.loveandindulgence.com.au

Touch me Please!

Written by Freya Watson

It was two in the morning and I was awake again, tossing and turning under the quilt with a restless yearning. My body had been used to being held, loved, stroked and pleasured, and it was suffering withdrawal symptoms.

I’d been separated—and celibate—for almost a year and was badly missing intimate physical contact. Don’t get me wrong. It’s not that I couldn’t find a massage therapist or a casual partner. I’d had plenty of massages, but none of them quite hit the spot. And casual partners weren’t exactly abundant at the time, for some reason. It wasn’t sex I was after, anyway—it was loving touch. The kind of touch a new lover naturally showers on their beloved in the early days of exploration and wonder.

I knew what I needed and was willing to ask, but finding it was another story. Luckily the dry period didn’t last long, though, and pretty soon my body was again feeling that happy glow that comes with being touched with love.

In the years since, when I take time off writing to see clients for healing, I’ve noticed how common it is to see people whose whole energy is begging, ‘touch me—please!’ Not that they’re necessarily aware of it, or looking for me to touch them. It’s just that they may not have had intimate contact with another person in years, and may have even forgotten how to allow themselves to be touched. Even if they’re in a relationship and sexually active, it doesn’t necessarily mean they are experiencing true intimacy and loving touch. Sex and intimacy don’t always go together. I wonder how many people go through adult life without being properly touched?

Our bodies are built for connection. Not just a casual hug or hand on the shoulder.

We’re built to thrive on love, and intimate touch is a natural physical manifestation of love. And by intimate touch I mean the kind that says ‘I’m right here, fully present with you, in this moment,’ rather than intimacy which is just about genital contact. It’s an intimacy which can be shared with anyone we love, not just sexual partners. Studies have shown that the cells in our bodies expand when they feel love and contract when they feel its opposite, and our ability to use our touch to transmit that energy to another is an innate gift which we all carry.

Modern society is moving further and further away from touch as a natural, integrated part of everyday life.

To fill the gap, we have created services that people buy and sell, but it’s not that same and we’re losing touch with our own natural ability to bring healing and pleasure to those close to us.

“Massage is needed in the world because love has disappeared. Once the very touch of lovers was enough. A mother touched the child, played with his body, and it was massage. The husband played with the body of his woman and it was massage; it was enough, more than enough. It was deep relaxation and part of love. But that has disappeared from the world. By and by we have forgotten where to touch, how to touch, how deep to touch. In fact touch is one of the most forgotten languages.” ~ Osho from ‘Hammer on the Rock’

Reawakening that ability for loving touch can be one of the simplest and most beautiful gifts to ourselves and our loved ones. At its most basic, just showing up and being willing to touch someone with the intention of bringing healing or love can be a comforting experience for another. And sometimes it’s as easy as that. We may shy away from placing soothing hands on an aching back or stroking a tense head, thinking drugs or a doctor are more efficient, or not wanting to spend the time. Surprisingly, though, it can be all that’s needed to shift a mood, lighten discomfort, or unlock a deeper emotional layer that’s ready to be cleared. More importantly, touch connects people and increases that sense of trust and love in the world in a way that doctors and drugs struggle to do.

In essence, reclaiming our ability to lovingly touch another—whether child, friend or lover—can be as straightforward as practicing the following four qualities. The more often we practice them, the deeper our touch can go.

Clear intention. Be clear about why you want to touch another and stay focused on that intention. Are you intending to create a sense of well-being? Or pleasure? Or comfort? Whatever it is, be clear in your mind about it before you start. As an experiment, ask a friend to close their eyes and try two variations of the same touch—stroke their arm once while thinking of your favorite movie and then a second time while intending that they feel your love. Then ask if they noticed any difference.

Love. It sounds simple to say ‘love the one you’re with’ but it’s not always that easy to access a feeling of love for someone at the drop of a hat. So find another way in to the energy—twiddle that internal dial until you find that feeling of love somewhere inside (try music, or the face of a lover, or the memory of a warm summer’s day). Use your mind or senses to find a catalyst that can bring you back to a deep feeling of love, then refocus the energy on the person you’re with.

Presence. You can’t hear what another’s body is trying to say to you if your mind is busy, so bring that mind fully into the moment! Focus on the sensation of touch, or on synchronizing your breathing with the person you’re touching, if you need to have something to keep the mind busy with. Being present brings a stillness, and intuition reaches us through that stillness.

Trust. Trust that you can bring a sense of well-being and love to another by touching them. Trust that somewhere deep inside, you know how and where to touch them. Then follow your instincts, get on with it and see where it leads you.

Feelings of pleasure and well-being aren’t just for the lucky one who’s being touched, either.

The beauty of feeling another opening under your touch and discovering the depths that can be hidden in the body brings with it a deeper connection to the mysteries of life as well as a sense of profound gratitude for this simple gift. So find a partner and get touching! Then teach your kids.

www.loveandindulgence.com.au

Smaller the average penis? No Problem!

It’s the age old question: Does size really matter? Dr. Emily Morse is here to answer your questions about what to do if your man isn’t so well endowed. It’s not as bad of a situation as you might think.

 

In short, penis size doesn’t have to be a pleasure deal-breaker – You can still have amazing sex with a partner whose penis length is less-than-average. Here are 3 tips to help you navigate this small situation and maximize pleasure for both parties!


1. Amp Up The Foreplay:

This is a tip for all men, regardless of what they’re packing down below, because guess what? The majority of women cannot orgasm from vaginal intercourse alone. Only about 20-30% of ladies consistently climax from plain old penis-and-vagina sex, meaning that less-endowed dudes have as much of a shot as any at providing their partners with multiple O’s.

This is his chance to make the most of the other tools he has at his disposal: his hands and his mouth. The more aroused you are before intercourse, the more likely you will be to have an orgasm. If he goes so far as to deliver you a couple orgasms before his penis even comes into play, then he will have one satisfied customer no matter what goes down in the main event.

2. Mind Your Positions:

There are two main types of orgasms women experience – the oh-so-elusive G-Spot orgasm and the more common clitoral orgasm. The clitoris is located outside of the vagina, (no penis necessary) and your G-Spot is nestled just a few inches inside, meaning you don’t really need a massive member to hit your sweet spots. It’s all about picking the best positions that makes optimal use of what he’s got.

Skip positions like missionary when you can, which aren’t as flattering for his size. Instead, opt for a woman-on-top position that puts the perfect amount of pressure on your clitoris and allows you to control depth and angle of penetration. Also, employ a grinding motion rather than a bounce in order to rub your pleasure points the right way. Another great option: the always popular doggie style! This position allows for some deep penetration, plus it will enable his penis to rub against your G-Spot.

Also, you can get the prime position for some intense penetration by bringing in some a few pillows to place under your womans hips which puts you at the perfect angle for some effort-free G-Spot stimulation and extra-deep intercourse.

3. Sex Toys for Two:

Bringing a sex toy into your lovemaking is great for multiple reasons. It’s kinky, it feels great and it takes a little pressure off your guy and his equipment. My personal favorite couples’ vibrator is the We-Vibe 4 – It’s a toy you can actually wear during intercourse, and is especially useful if your partner is lacking a little in the girth department.

The toy has two prongs, one of which inserts into your vagina while the other rests on top of your clitoris for two times the pleasure! The We-Vibe helps fill you up, making it a tighter fit for your partner, and provides a vibrating sensation that you both will enjoy. Now you can also enjoy it with the new App from anywhere pretty much on the globe!

In essence, there’s no reason to rule out a partner based on the size of their package. If they learn to master other bedroom skills, and are willing to work with what they’ve got, you can still have a very satisfying and orgasmic sex life. After all, it’s the lover, not the sex (or the sex organs, as the case may be), that give the pleasure.


www.loveandindulgence.com.au